Pretentious, there is one in all of us

July 2011

I love this line, which I first saw on a fashion website.
Though it is written with main focus on the Alta Sociedad I decided to borrow it as my title today. Nothing to do with fashion at all :-) And I am using the word sans the negative connotation.

We love to pretend. It started as toddlers when we ran our imaginations wild with dress-ups. We were dinosaurs roaring and stomping about, or dainty little fairies with magic wands. We were pink princesses and rockstars and warriors. In my case, a manicurista in White Orchids or a housemaid in the province. We were someone else rather than ourselves.

Later on it has become an escape of what is unacceptable in our lives. Somehow for some of us we've managed to hone this craft and turn it into a survival kit. Pretending became a way of life esp at times when the going gets tough. It not only help us survive but has become the much needed breath of fresh air, the breeze that heals.

Most of us might not be happy with what we have now. We might be disappointed when life offered us the dregs instead of the finest of opportunities, we might not have the support we so needed and we might even wish we were someone else, somewhere.

As adults we do put in a mask or two. How many of us put in our sunday's best and our sunday face at church? For some reason or another we think that we owe it to people to not burden them with our loads. Hence the cara. Everything will be okay  becomes our mantra. I have nothing against it. It is my daily mantra. I have faith that it works.

Facing my problems head-on is not one of my strongest points. Seize the bull by its horns is not only scary to me but crazily stupid as well. Why would I? I do not want to be killed! I too, like to escape somewhere safe and fuzzy where life is not as scary and confronting. Where possiblities are endless and responsibilities are limited to what I am willing to do.

I think that is why I love Calvin and Hobbes.
(They can discuss simple things and make them profound, while trying to figure out how to solve each and every dilemna in their own little way)

"Reading was my escape and my comfort, my consolation, my stimulant of choice: reading for the pure pleasure of it, for the beautiful stillness that surrounds you when you hear an author’s words reverberating in your head."— Paul Auster

I love my escape place and each time I am there, I run like the wind with Bullseye, then I feel reenergized. I feel reinvigorated to actually sit and breathe. To actually see the whole picture, of how I can manage the present storm.

As I wave my magic wand and sprinkle imaginary fairy dust I realize that this indeed is my survival kit. I can lose myself into this never ending loop of clouds and rest my weary thoughts. Then I breathe easier.



Putting myself in OPRAH magazine is
ridiculously hilarious!^_^

Whether I want to be eating arugula with fetta salad  on a European cruise with my family today, being on Oprah's couch promoting my children's book tomorrow, or watching Disneyland's nightly fireworks again - I take myself there. I am not running away from the realities of my life. I am just recharging my fuel so I will not run empty.

I have learned though to take someone with you on this escape. A best friend who will stay with you forever, your own Hobbes. I take my real BFF hubby with me. Sometimes, I leave him in a safe spot as I savour the breeze but I always come back. I am just fortunate that a husband is not the reason of wanting to run away.

Sometimes I just want peace and quiet. Rich gives me that, he being a quiet person by nature.

"Words can never fully say what we want them to say, for they fumble, stammer, and break the best porcelain. The best one can hope for is to find along the way someone to share the path, content to walk in silence, for the heart communes best when it does not try to speak." — Margaret Weis

Ah pretending, how you help me. How in your own special way give me that second wind, the so needed soother that gives me a calmer glimpse of what's to become.

Now, after I have unloaded my excess care, I can have the courage to fly like the wind and deal with the landing after I have enjoyed the horizon. My mind will be clear and my heart will be thumping positive vibrations.

And then... everything will be alright.

"Trying to be someone else, is a waste of the person you are" - Kurt Cobain